Cool SMS

What is the definition of Mistress?
Someone between the Mister and Mattress

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Husband asks:

“Do u know that the meaning of WIFE is:
W ithout
I nformation
F ighting
E very-time
Wife replies:

” No,……
It means:
W ith
I diot
F or
E ver !!!”

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What’s the difference between stress, tension and panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant,… Tension is when girlfriend is
pregnant.
Panic is when both are pregnant.
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Grammar Teacher: Do you know the importance of a period?
Kid: Yeah, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom fainted, dad got
a heart attack
& our driver ran away.